Simmer

“I wanted to end it”
she whispered, into the night.
“I want it over,
I’m so sick of the fight.”
But for all the times she said it
never was she 100% sure.
She didn’t have the strength
to hurt anyone who loved her.
So she swallowed the tears
as she rolled over in bed.
She wasn’t sure which hurt worse,
the marks on her arm or the ache in her head.
She closes her eyes and listens to silence
asking her thoughts to let her mind rest.
Slowly the chaos boils to a simmer.
She slips into the dark oblivion she knows best.
Forgetting for now what awaits her tomorrow.
Another day filled with false smiles and deep-set sorrow.
12.22.99/10.10pm

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